hello thar! I uh...

have a nostalgic feeling in my gut. makes me wanna ~ aaaaaaaagh. Its like having an itch that you can't really scratch away. Like you roughly know where the itch is coming from but no matter where you scratch it doesn't seem to go away?

That's the best I can describe this feeling. except the thing i'm trying to find is not where to scratch but what i can do to relive everything again. Not the first time i'm writing about this hahaha.

The brain goes to strange places when it has no where else to go. A wandering mind makes me uncomfortable.

haha kkk i change my mind about bookout/bookin. I admit - its disorienting. or maybe its just me. I find myself doing nothing a lot of times and I kinda feel guilty for it.

Haha while wondering around the internet i found out that simple plan was good again!

#2 is this: and its something wrong with sutd admissions

see i got 3As, and i got into sutd and no scholarship was awarded. This doesn't really sit well with me because, well, suddenly i may as well as have gotten a less good grade and took a course with a better grade requirement.

before you counter this super fail argument, lemme just point out this is a very very irrational feeling welled up inside that needs to be vocalised, and is never meant to stand up to any argument that anyone may use to counter. For one thing, I do like the course in SUTD so I'm not complaining there.

Just - you know, i thought there'd be a little more value to my hard work.

On top of that:

Paradox of choice

I really really felt like i could have done better for my interview. and that makes me feel very sour.

AGH I should stop complaining. shuddup damien. Sorry, guys.

hahha the night of 24k we were given popsicles :D I didn't recieve mine at first cos there weren't enough distributed so i went to get mine from the foam box.

While I was picking up my popsicle I sang 'I want to eat my popsicle..." (in the i wanna ride my bicycle fashion hahahhah) then I looked up and i was surrounded by commanders (including the OC and my PC and my PS hahhahaah) they made me sing it again.

Being happy is one thing, but i don't think its healthy to be OVERly happy. is there something like that?

I mean, I know things are going well for me, and I'm really happy. But somehow my brain wants to pick out the little things that make the picture look imperfect. Nitpicking, you say. Yes, I agree, and I'm sorry for that but I can't pretend to be happy about something I'm not, but I'll try not to make a big issue out of it I guess.

If you're wondering what this is about then here it is - otherwise don't continue cos this might leave a bitter aftertaste, but I dunnow. I need to vent.

Meh, its two things. I'm trying hard but I still can't seem to get along well with people. Not that i'm not nice to people, I just don't connect. Small-talk just isn't my strong suit. Tbh i see ppl getting along well and i get a little green-eyed. And sometimes i try to pitch in and i don't get the expected reaction - i.e. awkward silence hahhaha a bit discouraging so i try other ways to reach out and *shrug* i think in a way i'm making my own personality (consoles self)

Another thing... i shan't discuss today. sigh disappointed.

(think about good things)

Happy again :D

Cheers guys!

but ya know, i've been kinda busy :p hahhaha. Well I have. Kinda. You know, spending more time with parents, uni apps and an interview, going out with friends, sleeping, making cards, oh ya and bmt xD

Its all good. Its all great actually, but i've said that many times already. And recently I got my SUTD acceptance letter with no scholarship :) hahaha the smiley after that is kinda forced a bit because, well no scholarship. agh what am I doing I should be happy :D. agh, there a proper one lol. no la i am a bit disappointed, grateful nonetheless. I know for a fact i will be very happy in sutd. mmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmMMMM can't wait to ORD. (that was the sound of excitement) hahahaha.

My parents told me 2 years are gonna pass by very fast. And emphasize the fact every time i tell them I can't wait to ORD. Well I guess its true. And it also makes me realise that my parents in particular really don't want time to pass too quickly, and knowing that makes me want to take it slow and just chill with my family whenever I can. More later gonna bookout soon I needa fold my smart 4 and go for dindin.

WOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO xD

I'm so happy hahahahahaha.

Seriously things are waaay too good to be true right now. I really couldn't ask for more.

I'm gonna POP soon yay!

Labels: picture